Don't mess with "my" man

This shit is all about claiming. I had a cute, cerebral intro about the intricacies of relationships, but no... This is about "That's MINE." I can't help but think about all the grief Emily B has gotten for claiming a man who doesn't claim her. But I think I have solved the Rubik's cube that is the claim.

When a woman says "that's my man", what she really means is "I am his woman". She means I am dedicated to him, I support him, and I am loyal to him. To me that sounds like a declaration of fealty. Like she is pledging herself to him, which logically would make her his, not the other way around.

When men say "that's my woman" they mean "that's my woman"... i.e. That belongs to me. Not I belong to her. Now when women hear a man say "that's my woman", since we conflate our pledge of dedication with it being reciprocated we hear "I'm her man". Titling yourself or someone else does not imply they will do the same, and better yet it does not imply their behavior will be satisfactory.

So basically, we are out here reverse claiming. Next time call it what it is, not what you want it to be.